It's midnight and my little Jessi is asleep, as usual, in the nude. She had a very clingy day. I really think she feels when I need to just hold her and stop trying to be super mom. I'm awake trying to sort out some feelings. My house is not exactly neat. I have 5 loads of laundry to do and the floors are worse then the front side walk. But I get to hold her. I get to look down at her sweet face and see her smile so hard she almost tips over. I feel her relaxed breath and smell her familiar baby-milky smell. She has accomplished so much in 6 weeks. She weighs 10.7lbs and is 2 feet and 1/4 inches tall (laying down, of course). She loves to watch the kids play. She has been in her car seat twice and is OK as long as she is naked. She can not stand to be hot. Not at all. I know why her spirit communicated that she is not happy with where we live now! She stares at lights, likes being outside only if it is windy and gets super excited when Daddy comes home to smile at her. Gabriel can't stop kissing her and asking to hold her. Gino thinks she is so cute he can't stand it and Roman loves that she will always offer him a brilliant smile. Patricia protects her and giggles when she watches her. It's so nice to see her just light up in the company of her little sister, Jessica! I'm still doing the EC and I'm learning. She only wakes once or twice at night. She stays dry most nights and pees at dawn and sometimes poops too. She'll nurse, sleep and wake up around 9 or 10 to have several BMs. She grunts when she poops. I think she's copying me because I put her back to my belly and grunt so she feels the cue. Often in the morning she wants to nurse while she eliminates and that's fine with me. Breastfeeding relationship comes first! We're still working on the day time catches. She communicates with a little cry or screech and it's not to nurse. It's to let me know she has to go. She will also say "sssss" once in a while to cue me in. Sometimes, like me, she becomes distracted and totally gives me no warning. She almost always makes a face while eliminating. I'm feeling good about the EC'ing. I know it will take several more months to figure it out, but I like that she doesn't sit in her own stuff. That would feel horrible! (oh, she lets me know if she is in the sling and I can't feel it go through that she is uncomfortable with a wet bottom!)
I have been able to shower easily this time round. The master bath is big and so I put her in there on the floor on a blanket and she watches me- really the whole time-in the shower. Once a week or more I get in the bathtub with her afterwards. She loves it! She floats and kicks so much she makes white water! She is so strong! I am amazed at her kicks and punches- they hurt if you get in the way. And she moves so quickly. Wow. Her face rash is gone. I have found out that she gets the rash from me eating berries and tomatoes. Her pimples are gone, too. Her face is getting so plump. Her hair is coming in and it looks the same color as Patricia's. Her skin is lighter, like mine. Her eyes are still grey but turning a darker color grey.
The other children are adapting well to a new baby. Not quite back in to routine, but well. Trish really helps around the house, though she is frustrated by her demanding brothers. It's hard on her and I don't like to see her grouchy, but it happens. Roman has made some negative comments about me holding the baby all the time and I took time to tell him about when he was a baby. I also asked him if I should just let her lay by herself until she cried and he easily said NO WAY. I want to find some home movies of him as a baby and show him so he understands that I did the same thing with him, too. Gino said that I "like Jessi best right now", not in a negative or yelling way but just as a matter of fact. I'm sure it's because he loves loves loves to be hugged and sees me giving the most "hugs" to Jessica and figures it that way. I told him that I love everyone the same and the same thing I told Roman about what Jessica needs right now is the same thing he needed as a baby. He understood. HE would hold her all the time if I let him! Gabriel had a little transition time by "acting out" to get attention. It passed. The most difficulty around her is the cabin fever. Thankfully Danny took the kids to the park today so there was much less fighting among them. It happened the other summers too but last summer the pool helped. It's just too darn hot to be outside and I haven't taken them in the evenings to ride scooters on the school lot. The heat should break soon and I'll be able to take Jessica to the park without fear of both of us dehydrating.
I enjoyed the visits I've had. Danny's Mom and Dad came. Then my Sister, Tina, (she and Maggie picked out the cute dress Jessi is wearing in the photo) came and my Dad after. I hope others will come. We've had some local visitors, too. I really have some great friends here. I am so glad to have them. It makes me feel OK that my family is so far away.
So my babymoon is over. Back to grocery shopping, kid's sports, laundry and cleaning. Sigh. It's been a good run- the longest one of all! I'll start with short car trips and eventually Jessica will be fine in the car seat. My bleeding stopped and started all 6 weeks. Unusual for me. I dried Jessica's placenta- or so I thought. I had it drying in the food dehydrator for 48 hours and then I put it in a zip lock. I just checked it and it molded. Rats. No menopause "magic pill" for me. Oh well. I won't need it anyway. I just really didn't want to see the placenta rot because our freezer broke. I don't know what to do with it now. Hmmm, I can't just throw it out.
So, off to bed with me. How lucky I am. I love my children. I am so loved by them. Pure Joy.
I have been able to shower easily this time round. The master bath is big and so I put her in there on the floor on a blanket and she watches me- really the whole time-in the shower. Once a week or more I get in the bathtub with her afterwards. She loves it! She floats and kicks so much she makes white water! She is so strong! I am amazed at her kicks and punches- they hurt if you get in the way. And she moves so quickly. Wow. Her face rash is gone. I have found out that she gets the rash from me eating berries and tomatoes. Her pimples are gone, too. Her face is getting so plump. Her hair is coming in and it looks the same color as Patricia's. Her skin is lighter, like mine. Her eyes are still grey but turning a darker color grey.
The other children are adapting well to a new baby. Not quite back in to routine, but well. Trish really helps around the house, though she is frustrated by her demanding brothers. It's hard on her and I don't like to see her grouchy, but it happens. Roman has made some negative comments about me holding the baby all the time and I took time to tell him about when he was a baby. I also asked him if I should just let her lay by herself until she cried and he easily said NO WAY. I want to find some home movies of him as a baby and show him so he understands that I did the same thing with him, too. Gino said that I "like Jessi best right now", not in a negative or yelling way but just as a matter of fact. I'm sure it's because he loves loves loves to be hugged and sees me giving the most "hugs" to Jessica and figures it that way. I told him that I love everyone the same and the same thing I told Roman about what Jessica needs right now is the same thing he needed as a baby. He understood. HE would hold her all the time if I let him! Gabriel had a little transition time by "acting out" to get attention. It passed. The most difficulty around her is the cabin fever. Thankfully Danny took the kids to the park today so there was much less fighting among them. It happened the other summers too but last summer the pool helped. It's just too darn hot to be outside and I haven't taken them in the evenings to ride scooters on the school lot. The heat should break soon and I'll be able to take Jessica to the park without fear of both of us dehydrating.
I enjoyed the visits I've had. Danny's Mom and Dad came. Then my Sister, Tina, (she and Maggie picked out the cute dress Jessi is wearing in the photo) came and my Dad after. I hope others will come. We've had some local visitors, too. I really have some great friends here. I am so glad to have them. It makes me feel OK that my family is so far away.
So my babymoon is over. Back to grocery shopping, kid's sports, laundry and cleaning. Sigh. It's been a good run- the longest one of all! I'll start with short car trips and eventually Jessica will be fine in the car seat. My bleeding stopped and started all 6 weeks. Unusual for me. I dried Jessica's placenta- or so I thought. I had it drying in the food dehydrator for 48 hours and then I put it in a zip lock. I just checked it and it molded. Rats. No menopause "magic pill" for me. Oh well. I won't need it anyway. I just really didn't want to see the placenta rot because our freezer broke. I don't know what to do with it now. Hmmm, I can't just throw it out.
So, off to bed with me. How lucky I am. I love my children. I am so loved by them. Pure Joy.
